Just stopping by for a few minutes! I doubt anyone is up though since it’s almost two in the morning. Just want to come and talk about some things that I have been battling with since I came home.
Two months ago I cut the rest of my relaxed ends off and started wearing the natural state of my hair. Fortunately, I received positive feedback from a lot of young women back at school. So I hadn’t thought I was different or my hair was “ugly” because I was around so many naturals.
Coming back home has been a different story man. People really don’t know how to respond AT ALL. The one thing I’ve been getting since I’ve gotten here is “Oh…you going natural?” I’ve heard that a billion times since I’ve been home and I always looked shocked because clearly I am not going anywhere, my hair is in it’s natural state.
I think my parents are still getting used to my hair. At first they didn’t like it, but I guess it’s growing on them. I think they don’t think that it compliments my facial structure. I only receive compliments from others if my hair is in a “style” but never when I rock my curl pattern. Only when it’s closer to being straight…
But I am not here to talk about my story of natural hair, I want to talk about the discomfort I’ve felt these last two weeks. I became upset because I keep wondering why hair is the biggest thing that defines females. Why should my hair state change me? Seriously, why should something so small define us? I seriously feel like my identity was being attacked…that I was no longer beautiful because my hair wasn’t relaxed or I didn’t wear weave anymore.
Then I realized something so simple….I had to be ME. God placed me here for a reason and created me so why should I question my identity or have to have something as simple as hair to be an important factor in my life? I felt like I was fighting to defend myself and at the same time being tortured by peoples’ statements.
So for anyone dealing with self esteem issues, you are not alone. We all battle them, but ignorant mindsets of others make people question whether their hair is nice enough, whether their weight is low enough, or whether their face/body is pretty enough. So don’t listen to people’s words….don’t let them cut you. Stay strong and remember we are all fearfully and wonderfully made in God’s image. God’s works are wonderful and we are each apart of this work (Psalm 139:14, NIV).
Stay blessed and be free….To tell you the truth, I have never felt so free before in my life. I am able to truly appreciate myself when I stopped relying on little things to make me. With my short hair, I no longer hide behind my hair (Which I did for sooo long), I am able to see all the oontours of my face and appreciate what God gave me. So love what God gave you and rock your hair in whatever state (relaxed,weaved, natural), wear that shirt that people don’t like, or try that hair color you’ve been contemplating for so long. Forget what society says, be free.