late night rant: a real man, a real woman

So as we know we are in a time that is far, far away from the courtship and going steady culture. We are living in a society where sexual images are presented any and everywhere. My friend Alana and I have been discussing a what defines a truth in a society full of bad images and influences. Society is constantly trying to make us sell our integrity to feel “confident” “important”….” LOVED”. I am convinced that true love occurs between a gentleman and a lady. 

I feel like guys have lost all respect for women these days. They don’t even want to know your name before they are asking for sex. Believe me, I’ve experienced this first hand. The images that “real” rappers and artists portray are doing absolutely NOTHING for women. Young guys take on these personas and they never really learn how to treat a woman with respect.

BUT, speaking from a young woman’s perspective, I do believe there is a lot we could do to make guys respect us. First of all, having confidence and knowing your worth will allow you to know how you are supposed to be treated. NO, you shouldn’t be a side-chick, fling, or “friend”. You say you are “different” but you are constantly going after the same guys….with the SAME motives. Please don’t believe what he is saying…he has told the same stuff to many other girls.

PLEASE give the good guys a chance…please. They are out there, believe me…it just takes time for them to approach you. A guy who is constantly the center of attention may not be a good look. He may make you feel special, but you could be a number. OH and you can’t change him and his ways….YOU CAN’T CHANGE ANYONE.

WATCH who you get advice from, not just about guys, but life in general. What one person is exposed and what one person prefers may not be what’s best for you in the long run…Just because your friend is use to sex on the first date don’t mean you have to do it to. Can’t mirror a relationship that is uniquely yours with another’s.

Look, I don’t know much about love at all, but I know how I am supposed to be treated and I know what a good guy is. I have been blessed with a dad that shows me how much he respects my mom. I haven’t been in a relationship in sooooo long, but I really don’t care anymore. People constantly ask me, “Why don’t you talk to anyone”, “Where is your boyfriend”. I used to be embarrassed until I realized something. I am truly, truly blessed to dodge the losers. God has protected me from the jerks and the assholes. I’ve had a few  splits with a few guys…BUT not as much as other girls. Some girls go to high school wanting to be the center of attention, but becomes the school’s whore. Girls come to college wanting to spice up their lives and change their image, but sleep with the wrong person and ruins their reputations. Over the last month, I’ve learned what defines a true gentleman. He may take it slow, but the fast route leads to a quick break-up. He may be quiet, but usually the shyest guy has the most amazing heart and mind. Also, he will never force you to do anything you wouldn’t want to do. He will wait.

So wait…God has the perfect man out there for you. Don’t force it because you can’t have something God doesn’t want you to have. By being a lady, you set the stage for the way a guy should treat you. You are in control.

I may not have had many boyfriends or talked to many guys thus far in college, but I’m drama-free. I haven’t had to shape my image based on how a guy sees me, I truly, genuinely love myself. I am a firm believer in self-love before true love in a relationship.

Sorry for the rant but God placed it on my heart to blog about this. Someone may need to hear this. I hope I’ve helped you out someway or the other. Stay blessed.

peace/love.